Devils Dance
by Caitlynnn
Summary: "Twenty years to live. Some may say that's not enough time to do a lot of things. I say that's plenty of time." his mind was a little twisted. His thoughts a little bit dark. But to him, it all made sense. A Tate/Ben story. ONESHOT.


**The line, "Can you just hang out with me sometimes?" Really drove at my heart. And this happend. I don't know how i feel about this. I actually sort of like it... **

**Reviews would be cool.**

**I don't own American Horror Story. **

Ben was washing the dishes, he sighed a little as Vivien left the room to go take care of some business upstairs. He was slowly getting used to this... Dead thing. It wasn't his favourite thing, but he was getting used to it. It seemed like everyone in his family was already thinking that nothing never really happened. But he was slowly okay with that. He turned around and saw a nervous Tate. He looked down at the ground and then looked away. "What do you want, Tate?" he said a little bit bitterly. He wasn't forgiven but everything would be okay in the long run. They had forever, after all.

"I uh.. I just wanted to talk." Tate's voice was hoarse, he was already starting to tear up, he just needed someone to listen to him. All he had was really Hayden. And his mom went ape shit with his son, he couldn't talk to her. Devil's mistress. He just hated his mom. He knew he shouldn't. But she was horrible. No one really understood why he hated her so much. Being pushed to a point where you break is not fun. Especially if it was every day of your life. That's what it felt like for Tate. Who knows why he became such a... Monster. But was he really a monster? He meant well. Just no one was willing to see past the so called horns.

"I have stuff to do Tate." Ben replied and Tate just shook his head and laughed. "Bullshit. I'm not taking that." he started to back away. "But I'll leave you alone if thats what you want." even after after all the crap that happened, with everything that went down, Tate really did... Love Ben. He was the father figure that Tate really never had or really accepted. Perhaps that was weird, and slightly crazy, but it was one of those days where the depression was a little bit overwhelming. He was trying to get better at telling people how he felt. His heart on his sleeve.

Tate turned around feeling the water works already to start. It was a hard forever ahead of him. The one he loves doesn't even want to talk to him, he's stuck in a house with everyone absolutely hating him. He would forever be alone and tormented. Everyone deserves love. Even people like Tate. Happiness is something real. Tate experienced it once. Once the doors to love open, the highway of control closes. You can't help it but feel happy when you love someone. And yet, it's totally hurtful the same time. Because you sort of want to die when you love someone. You feel small, and yet at the same time, you believe anything is possible.

"Tate. Wait." Ben hated himself for this. "I have ten minutes."

So they went in the living room, Ben pulled out a pack cigarettes, lighting one up. He offered one to Tate, he shook his head. "I didn't know you smoked." Tate said conversationally sitting in the exact same place Violet sat. He was trying to recall back those memories. But they were so faint to him. His heart ached a little.

"Old habits die hard." Ben replied, taking in a slow drag, letting the smoke fill up his lungs. The weight was slowly coming off. There was tension in the air. None of the happy stuff.

"So you wanted to talk. Let's talk." Ben took another drag. The smoke blew in Tate's face, he wrinkled his nose a little bit.

"I just... Feel lost, you know? I mean, I sort of made myself get lost on purpose but..." he wasn't sure what he was getting at. But he really hated himself. He hated how exhausting he was. It was just hard being Tate. He was a tormented soul. He has done so much shit, it's all unforgivable. He deserves everything he gets, he even knows that. But there is good left. Just no one really believes in him anymore. The briefs moment of happiness is something he'll never forget. Because, he loved something more than he loved himself. His thoughts weren't as dark, and he smiled a bit more. He wanted to be good- he still does. But it's getting to the point where the piles of all the tragedies he caused are smacking him in the face.

"I didn't know heartbreak hurt this much." he never felt anything. When he killed people it was just to cover up the numbness. He liked it. He liked hurting people. He got high off of hurting people. He wasn't sure why. But since he was tormented inside, he figured taking it out on people, to prove a point he was tormented was easy. He was weightless. Like he achieved something. But that was sad. The only thing he achieved was killing people. That's all he would ever be good at. No one really knows what made him this way. Not even himself. There was just something that clicked.

Monsters aren't born evil. There is a reason behind all the killings. Monsters have feelings too. They're still human. Evil hurt, too. Is evil really evil? Is evil another word for misunderstood. What makes you evil? Evil thoughts are different than evil actions. Actions is a weird thing. You can totally misinterpret why people do the things. It's like when you look at a picture, the guy next to you can see it totally different, in a totally different light. That's the beauty about people. You see things differently. You feel things differently. We'll never understand it. But these are the thoughts that drive Tate insane.

"Well Tate, you did some really... Fucked up stuff." Ben cared for Tate, but it was more of a business deal for Ben. It was something he really wanted for himself. But having gone through much stuff himself. He figured he'd give a little compassion. Ben had a heart, it was still there. He was one of the few people that cared for Tate. Violet would always love Tate. That was never changing. She wanted Tate so badly, she craved for his affections, and his wit, his... Vulnerable strength. But she couldn't deal with him anymore. Not for a while, that is.

"Why did you do it?" Ben was honestly curious. He never understood why people do such evil acts. He would never really understand. But he lived with a psychopath.

Tate looked down and his hands that were now shaking. He looked up at Ben with a mere shrug and said,"Why did you cheat on your wife?" he didn't know how else to explain it.

"That's the not the same thing though." Ben snapped.

"No, it's not. You're right. But like you, I don't have an answer."

Hayden walked in the room and rolled her eyes. "God. You men cry more than all of us girls combined."

Tate used his sleeve to wipe away the tears.

"I can't help you Tate." he tried.

"I don't need you to help me! I just need someone to listen to me!" Tate was angry. Not at Ben, at himself.

"I exhaust myself all the time. I can't take myself anymore." he rolled up his sleeve. "I did this." he carved the word Hate. He really did hate himself. He hated himself more than everyone in the house combined. "And the worst part? It didn't hurt me at all."

An idea sprung in Tate's mind. "Hit me." he said quietly. "Ben hit me." he begged. He wanted and needed to be hit. He loved getting the shit and the snot knocked out of him. He loved being hit as much as he loved hitting people. "Do it. I know you've been dying to." he shoved Ben into the wall. "so do it."

The erratic behaviour threw Ben off, he shook his head. "Tate I can't."

Tate laughed at him. "Oh come on. I'm giving it to you for free. Everyone loves free things. Especially if it's hitting me." he knew that people wouldn't dare cross Tate. He was the only real smart one here besides really Violet and Hayden. "Just do it." he was going in deep, everything he just said would explode in seconds. "I fucked your wife. I fucked your daughter. I have the devils child. I ruined everything for you."

Ben took Tate and threw him to the wall. He took the coffee table and threw it at Tate and he laughed, almost as if Ben was telling him the funniest joke ever. But Tate's life was a big joke. Nothing ever really went right for him. Bens anger was getting stronger he yelled and the tears were rolling into his mouth as he kept beating the dead shit out of Tate. But he kept laughing. It hurt so much, it hurt to a point where you just had to laugh. It was almost like Patrick, but Tate really did love Ben. That's why he was allowing it to happen.

He was the father Tate never really had.

Ben stopped and collapsed on the floor, out of breath and Tate was still laughing but he slumped next to Ben. "Feels good, yeah?" he said, out of breath as well, trying to control his little giggle fits that were escaping him.

"It looked like you needed it." Tate really didn't want Ben to hit him. And at the same time he did. He was torn between destroying himself and destroying other people. Once you love someone you always end up destroying them. It went against everything Tate went for... Morally. But it was the truth. Of course you want to protect the ones you love, but you cant help it. Sometimes when you love someone, you have to let them hurt for a while until they come back to you.

A wood pecker was pecking at the house, and Tate admired it. "Hear that?" he shoved Ben a little. "It's a woodpecker." He smiled a bit.

"Ive always loved birds." He used to research birds a lot as a kid. He always found them so interesting. "Did you know penguins mate for life? And once their mate dies they cry for a really long time? When they're away they get sick." He knew about this for a long time. But he just felt like he needed to say it.

Ben didn't say anything he just listened.

"I always felt like I could relate to the black vulture. They dance around the dead. And sometimes they swoop down and take up the innocent." he shrugs. "Vultures mate for life too." he sighed a little. "I guess it might have to do with the fact that vultures are kind of ugly. Once they find a mate I think they cling onto them like a lifeline. Or something. The ugliness is no longer there. The way they fly is... Sort of beautiful." his thoughts flickered to Violet.

"I wish I was a bird sometimes." Tate didn't know why but he was getting emotional from it all.

"Their lifespan is only twenty years." He kept talking, not caring if Ben was listening or not. He didn't care. But it was nice just having someone there.

"Twenty years to live. Some may say that's not enough time to do a lot of things. I say that's plenty of time." his mind was a little twisted. His thoughts a little bit dark. But to him, it all made sense. People will look at him weird. He was okay with that.

Ben put an arm around Tate because he heard Tate's faint sobs. There was just too much bad shit in this house, it was a house full of pain and regrets and tragedy. Ben would never forgive Tate. But just a simple gesture meant so much to Tate.

Violet may never forgive, his mother may never really love Tate, and Vivien may have had his kid, or Constance have his kid, the fifteen kids didn't deserve to lose their life, the gay couple didn't really love each other, but they would always have that memory together, they died so close to each other. Nora would never be happy, even if Tate tried. And Ben would never really understand Tate.

Not even Tate would understand Tate.

"I just want to fly away from it all." Ignoring the problem was so much easier.

"But I'm stuck here in a house that hates me." he's broken so many hearts. He's shattered people's lives. Some may say he's of the devil. But the devil can't love. The devil may be beautiful. But love overcomes it all. It's all people have sometimes.

Tate is slowly starting to accept it. He's not loveable. He cries too much, but hates so easily. He loves too hard, and he's twisted. He's fucked. He's... Broken. He's not a fallen angel. He never went to heaven. But he's gone through hell and back. So what does that make him? He's not too sure.

No one will really know.

**Review?**


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